Tomorrow, or by the time I finish typing out this post, will be our 28th anniversary.
28 years.
I should be impressed with myself/us.
I'm not.
Not because it is insignificant.
But because let's face it.
GRACE.OF.GOD.
I have nothing impressive to show you. No advice about how to be a good wife. No real wisdom of my gray hairs. No list of things to do to have a long marriage. No revelations that will help you through anything.
Just good old Grace of GOD.
HE alone is faithful.
28 years ago, I stood in front of a judge, a young, stupid, terrified, confident, confused, determined 17 year old senior in high school.
Doomed by everyone.
Except for HIM.
And I promised/pledged/made a commitment to something that I had no idea what it meant.
But HE did.
Even when HE was not a real part of my life yet, HE was at work. HE moved HIS hand. HE watched and blessed. HE stepped in. HE never left.
Not going to lie.
Sometimes I wish for a different outcome. Petty, selfish things, really.
Like...um... a vegan? A want-to-live-in-a-community-hippie? A crazy Irishman? Someone that has very little in common with me? Including the Faith?
Yeah, I wish it was different.
I wish he was different. I wish I was different.
But it is not the case.
And it is good.
I suppose if I was to give a young wife some advice it would be...
CLING TO THE CROSS. Start now, when life is sweet, good, loving. Because it will get hard, there will be anger, loneliness, frustration, tears, 'options', uncaring moments. And the Cross is all you have. It is all you need.
CLING TO THE CROSS. Because it will be beautiful, loving, joy filled, laughter full, magical, important, peaceful, delightful, becoming one in every aspect. And you will need Someone to thank and be grateful to, because you know it is not your doing.
CLING TO THE CROSS.
That could stand alone in a wedding ceremony.
Speaking of, I want to renew our vows. I wanted to do it at our 25th anniversary. But, since we had just come back from China 9 days before...not so much.
Maybe our 30th.
Am I confident to reach 30? Only by the GRACE.OF.GOD.
Happy Anniversary, My Love. Thank You, my King.
Daisypath Anniversary tickers
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Speaking of Survival
Speaking of surviving life...
I hum.
It used to ( may still) drive my mother nuts when I was young, when life would be falling apart around me, or I would be in the process of being disciplined, lectured, whatever, and I would start to hum.
I didn't even notice it until she told me to just STOP IT. In her own words. lol.
I just start to hum, maybe to escape my reality, overpower my moment and be transported to another thought, who knows.
I still hum.
ALL THE TIME.
It may or may not drive my husband nuts, too. I still don't notice that I am doing it.
Life is h.a.r.d. and just doesn't seems to get any easier. Better sometimes, maybe even good. But always hard.
Now, I hum hymns.
Hymns are my anchor.
They are my survival mechanism.
I love, love, love hymns.
Worship music is good, enjoyable, yes, can take you to the Throne of the Almighty. But they will never take the place of hymns in my heart. Hymns are so meaty, so thelologically powerful.
My anchor.
My favorite hymn:
But seriously, who can''t love Rock of Ages, How Great Thou Art, Blessed Assurance, Sweet Hour of Prayer, Amazing Grace, Holy Holy Holy, Be Thou My Vision, This is My Father's World, It Is Well With My Soul, The Old Rugged Cross...
Whoa, this list will take all night.
Anyway, humming helps me survive. It keeps Jesus close. It transports me to peace.
It takes me to HIS Throne.
Here is the interesting part:
Yesterday, while doing school, Elly-Bug was humming. A hymn.
Life is good.
I hum.
It used to ( may still) drive my mother nuts when I was young, when life would be falling apart around me, or I would be in the process of being disciplined, lectured, whatever, and I would start to hum.
I didn't even notice it until she told me to just STOP IT. In her own words. lol.
I just start to hum, maybe to escape my reality, overpower my moment and be transported to another thought, who knows.
I still hum.
ALL THE TIME.
It may or may not drive my husband nuts, too. I still don't notice that I am doing it.
Life is h.a.r.d. and just doesn't seems to get any easier. Better sometimes, maybe even good. But always hard.
Now, I hum hymns.
Hymns are my anchor.
They are my survival mechanism.
I love, love, love hymns.
Worship music is good, enjoyable, yes, can take you to the Throne of the Almighty. But they will never take the place of hymns in my heart. Hymns are so meaty, so thelologically powerful.
My anchor.
My favorite hymn:
But seriously, who can''t love Rock of Ages, How Great Thou Art, Blessed Assurance, Sweet Hour of Prayer, Amazing Grace, Holy Holy Holy, Be Thou My Vision, This is My Father's World, It Is Well With My Soul, The Old Rugged Cross...
Whoa, this list will take all night.
Anyway, humming helps me survive. It keeps Jesus close. It transports me to peace.
It takes me to HIS Throne.
Here is the interesting part:
Yesterday, while doing school, Elly-Bug was humming. A hymn.
Life is good.
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Survivalist Package??!!??!
I have been getting random packages lately.
Seriously, I forget I ordered something, it comes in and as soon as I see the return address, I remember and have the spirit of YAY!!! I forgot I ordered this!! YAY!!!
Today, I got a package with the return name of Survival Preparedness.
I know for a fact I never ordered anything from such a place. I am such an unprepared survivalist. I am the character who would not know what on earth was going on so I would be killed first in a horror movie.
Not that I watch horror movies.
ANYWAY, I knew for sure that this was a fluke. Except for the fact that it had my name on it. Not 'Our Neighbors At..."
WELL, I did indeed order from them.
See, for this year's garden, I decided I was going to make sure all the seeds/plants were organic/heirloom.
For the most part they are super expensive. I found the best price at this place. Samuel asked me what was so survivalist about heirloom seeds.
I guess the fact the you can grow your veggies/fruit/beans/grains, get a crop full, dry some of your seeds and used them again next year. And forever, really.
The GMO ones, which are the ones you buy at the store, not only cause havoc and disaster in your body, they also at one point, ( if they have not done so already) are trying to manufactor terminator seeds. Seeds that if preserved for the following year, will grow inferior crops, and then after that will be sterile.
Yeah.
Anyway, like I said, heirloom seeds will be happy to reproduce themselves, and you can use them over and over without paying royalties for something you paid for/already own.
PLUS the more added benefit of eating something real. :)
About a month from now, maybe less, we will start our planting. Inside. From the seeds. The girls will love it! Samuel will be in charge ( with hidden supervision) this year. He will teach them and explain as well as be responsible for their growth.
There has got to be something about having that kind of responsibility. Like making sure the chickens don't die. As he goes out every morning to feed them, gather the eggs and make sure they have fresh water, and if it cold outside, make sure they have water again so he has to break apart the ice.
Speaking of the chickens, a few months ago, when they arrived, the thought of eating them was not an option. When I was talking to this woman in our homeschool group about them, I realized, I think I can do it. Kill them, clean them up and throw them in the freezer. It doesn't scare me anymore. Well, not much anyway. I will call my friend, maybe even my son in law, and we can do this!
Anyway, I love packages. And life. And man, I sure love GOD!!!!
He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High
Shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.
2 I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress;
My God, in Him I will trust.” Psalm 91:1 &2
Seriously, I forget I ordered something, it comes in and as soon as I see the return address, I remember and have the spirit of YAY!!! I forgot I ordered this!! YAY!!!
Today, I got a package with the return name of Survival Preparedness.
I know for a fact I never ordered anything from such a place. I am such an unprepared survivalist. I am the character who would not know what on earth was going on so I would be killed first in a horror movie.
Not that I watch horror movies.
ANYWAY, I knew for sure that this was a fluke. Except for the fact that it had my name on it. Not 'Our Neighbors At..."
WELL, I did indeed order from them.
See, for this year's garden, I decided I was going to make sure all the seeds/plants were organic/heirloom.
For the most part they are super expensive. I found the best price at this place. Samuel asked me what was so survivalist about heirloom seeds.
I guess the fact the you can grow your veggies/fruit/beans/grains, get a crop full, dry some of your seeds and used them again next year. And forever, really.
The GMO ones, which are the ones you buy at the store, not only cause havoc and disaster in your body, they also at one point, ( if they have not done so already) are trying to manufactor terminator seeds. Seeds that if preserved for the following year, will grow inferior crops, and then after that will be sterile.
Yeah.
Anyway, like I said, heirloom seeds will be happy to reproduce themselves, and you can use them over and over without paying royalties for something you paid for/already own.
PLUS the more added benefit of eating something real. :)
About a month from now, maybe less, we will start our planting. Inside. From the seeds. The girls will love it! Samuel will be in charge ( with hidden supervision) this year. He will teach them and explain as well as be responsible for their growth.
There has got to be something about having that kind of responsibility. Like making sure the chickens don't die. As he goes out every morning to feed them, gather the eggs and make sure they have fresh water, and if it cold outside, make sure they have water again so he has to break apart the ice.
Speaking of the chickens, a few months ago, when they arrived, the thought of eating them was not an option. When I was talking to this woman in our homeschool group about them, I realized, I think I can do it. Kill them, clean them up and throw them in the freezer. It doesn't scare me anymore. Well, not much anyway. I will call my friend, maybe even my son in law, and we can do this!
Anyway, I love packages. And life. And man, I sure love GOD!!!!
He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High
Shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.
2 I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress;
My God, in Him I will trust.” Psalm 91:1 &2
Saturday, January 12, 2013
Daughter #3 is adjusting so very well. GOD is good. I know it could go either way. And we have done nothing to deserve such a joyous and delightful girl. ( Girls)
And she is losing teeth like crazy. But that is besides the point.
She is communicating so well now. Her English is amazing.
That being the case, she now shares so much about her life in Africa.
Like tonight, when we ( and when I say we, I mean me) were doing her hair after her shower, (which you may or may not know, doing her hair is a part time job)( I like this job most of the time, even if I don't know what I am doing) she started telling me about how scared she used to be when she was in Africa.
I asked her questions to see if she was imagining or recalling.
She was definitely recalling. Like how she didn't like it when she went out sometimes because men had guns on the street. She told me how sometimes she and her friends would play with guns, but she assured me that they were only pretend guns, not like the men.
And how when she would take a shower and then not take another one for a long long long time. Not like here. And her showers were cold, unless her mommy ( foster mom, whom I cannot be thankful enough for the love she showed this child. Yes, she was a Christian, too :D ) boiled water. And sometimes her mom boiled water AND it was sunny outside. Those were her favorite. But they were mostly cold and fast.
And then how sometimes at night she would be so hungry, but there was no food, so her older brother who was so big and tall (foster brother) would go out and get her some food so she could eat. And it made her so happy.
Or when she had so many boo boos on her feet and they hurt so much and the bugs would be on her boo boos. And her mommy from Africa would put medicine, but they still hurt. She still looks at her feet now, I imagine, amazed that there is nothing wrong with them. I didn't understand her odd fascination with her feet until I heard this story. I suppose one day, she will stop looking at them.
Or not.
She told me about how her tummy hurt all the time in Africa. And when it was her birthday, her tummy hurt so much she couldn't eat.
The story about how her daddy from Africa died, and she never got to see his face. He did, in the war. She did, but was very very young, so she doesn't remember. She told me that even though he died, he loved her very much, just like her daddy in New Jersey.
She has shared so many stories.
Some shockingly bad. Some funny. Some interesting. Some too personal to share. Some so very sad.
But all in all, I think the reason I am sharing this with you, that one person who is reading this, is that she is the happiest most delightful child on this family. Her laughter is addicting and contagious. Her thankfulness is humbling. Her reality is, well...real.
Her life is my blessing.
When GOD asked us to adopt again, which was NOT in OUR plan, I resisted. I argued. I resented. We had no money and I made sure HE knew it every chance I had, as I argued with HIM. We still have no money, and now even less.
BUT... HE asked, and HE knows what HE is doing. I cannot imagine life without her. Or Elena.
And how does one put a price on a soul?
SO, we will have our old cars, small home, used clothes, tiny kitchen, with limited activities in our blue collar town.
But when you hear that laughter and joy coming from the direction of the North East... that would be us. :)
And she is losing teeth like crazy. But that is besides the point.
She is communicating so well now. Her English is amazing.
That being the case, she now shares so much about her life in Africa.
Like tonight, when we ( and when I say we, I mean me) were doing her hair after her shower, (which you may or may not know, doing her hair is a part time job)( I like this job most of the time, even if I don't know what I am doing) she started telling me about how scared she used to be when she was in Africa.
I asked her questions to see if she was imagining or recalling.
She was definitely recalling. Like how she didn't like it when she went out sometimes because men had guns on the street. She told me how sometimes she and her friends would play with guns, but she assured me that they were only pretend guns, not like the men.
And how when she would take a shower and then not take another one for a long long long time. Not like here. And her showers were cold, unless her mommy ( foster mom, whom I cannot be thankful enough for the love she showed this child. Yes, she was a Christian, too :D ) boiled water. And sometimes her mom boiled water AND it was sunny outside. Those were her favorite. But they were mostly cold and fast.
And then how sometimes at night she would be so hungry, but there was no food, so her older brother who was so big and tall (foster brother) would go out and get her some food so she could eat. And it made her so happy.
Or when she had so many boo boos on her feet and they hurt so much and the bugs would be on her boo boos. And her mommy from Africa would put medicine, but they still hurt. She still looks at her feet now, I imagine, amazed that there is nothing wrong with them. I didn't understand her odd fascination with her feet until I heard this story. I suppose one day, she will stop looking at them.
Or not.
She told me about how her tummy hurt all the time in Africa. And when it was her birthday, her tummy hurt so much she couldn't eat.
The story about how her daddy from Africa died, and she never got to see his face. He did, in the war. She did, but was very very young, so she doesn't remember. She told me that even though he died, he loved her very much, just like her daddy in New Jersey.
She has shared so many stories.
Some shockingly bad. Some funny. Some interesting. Some too personal to share. Some so very sad.
But all in all, I think the reason I am sharing this with you, that one person who is reading this, is that she is the happiest most delightful child on this family. Her laughter is addicting and contagious. Her thankfulness is humbling. Her reality is, well...real.
Her life is my blessing.
When GOD asked us to adopt again, which was NOT in OUR plan, I resisted. I argued. I resented. We had no money and I made sure HE knew it every chance I had, as I argued with HIM. We still have no money, and now even less.
BUT... HE asked, and HE knows what HE is doing. I cannot imagine life without her. Or Elena.
And how does one put a price on a soul?
SO, we will have our old cars, small home, used clothes, tiny kitchen, with limited activities in our blue collar town.
But when you hear that laughter and joy coming from the direction of the North East... that would be us. :)
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
veganism, oils and life.
Let me begin by saying I am not a vegan.
Not even a vegetarian.
But by default, I am living a vegan/vegetarian lifestyle.
Granted the children and I DO eat meat ( mostly chicken) about twice a week. Sometimes even 3x!! WOO-HOO!
It has been about 9 months since my husband went vegan. In that time I have had to come up with way too many creative things to do with beans.
My husband is not only a vegan, but a soy less vegan.
See...most vegan cookbooks I got out of the library, and I am thankful they have great ones, assume that you use soy. SO their recipes, which look amazing, cannot be done for this man.
I should get a medal or something for putting up with this and actually making it happen.
Because quite frankly, it makes me crazy.
During this time, I am getting a fair education on natural living. I have been wanting to do this for decades. But the love of my life was not interested. At the time.
Now, not only do we try to eat healthier, organic and smarter, but also how we deal with things that DO come up. Such as colds, the flu, stomach viruses, etc.
It has been about 2 years since we have had over the counter meds. OR prescription medication.
Not that we haven't gotten sick or had issues. But now we deal with them naturally. And it has been fantastic!!
Some people have accused us of being fanatics and deviating from GOD because of this.
I find that funny in a sad kind of way. Starting with the fact that I have NEVER pushed our lifestyle on people. If they are interested, we can talk, but if not, I say nothing. I know no one can convince anyone else to their side. It has to be desired.
And HEY... did not GOD give this to us? Did HE not provide natural cures for HIS people just for the taking? And yet, how does taking prescription meds more GODLY?
duh.
I watch football. I love football. There show allopathic commercials during games. Samuel and I always time how long the warnings are. There has never been a time when the warnings did not last WAY longer than the benefits. It has become a game for us. Almost laughable if not for the fact that millions of people are calling their doctors and ask for said medication. Then it is no longer funny but tragic.
Now don't get me wrong, I am thankful for allopathic medicine in some instances, for example if my child breaks his or her arm, I do not want to go to the emergency room and have someone say, 'here eat an apple'. duh.
I just think too often, there are things we can do to benefit our body first, way many more natural options before trying to fix it and not harm it else where.
Moving on...
Like I mentioned before, I signed up for 1/2 marathon #4.
I think I am crazy. And maybe a little delusional. OR maybe just a glutton for punishment.
OR maybe I will not go to the gym unless there is a goal to reach. And to show just how pathetic I am, before you think I am this person who has their act together ( HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA) getting in shape is not a good enough reason for me to wake up at 5:45 in the morning to go to the gym.
No sirree. There has to be a GOOD reason to get up that early.
The SUPER HERO 1/2 is it....
Seriously, I CANNOT WAIT to wear a cape!!!
In honor of doing this, my daughter got me a book.
How to Train Like A Mother.
If it wasn't that she is so excited, and she is a natural runner herself, I would think she was evil.
And hey, why is there not a book called How To Train Like A Grandmother?
I should write it.
The first chapter would be called, "Are you 7 Kinds of Stupid??!!??" And the second, " Put Down The Running Shoes and Go Bake Some Cookies."
Now thats my kind of book!!!
Not even a vegetarian.
But by default, I am living a vegan/vegetarian lifestyle.
Granted the children and I DO eat meat ( mostly chicken) about twice a week. Sometimes even 3x!! WOO-HOO!
It has been about 9 months since my husband went vegan. In that time I have had to come up with way too many creative things to do with beans.
My husband is not only a vegan, but a soy less vegan.
See...most vegan cookbooks I got out of the library, and I am thankful they have great ones, assume that you use soy. SO their recipes, which look amazing, cannot be done for this man.
I should get a medal or something for putting up with this and actually making it happen.
Because quite frankly, it makes me crazy.
During this time, I am getting a fair education on natural living. I have been wanting to do this for decades. But the love of my life was not interested. At the time.
Now, not only do we try to eat healthier, organic and smarter, but also how we deal with things that DO come up. Such as colds, the flu, stomach viruses, etc.
It has been about 2 years since we have had over the counter meds. OR prescription medication.
Not that we haven't gotten sick or had issues. But now we deal with them naturally. And it has been fantastic!!
Some people have accused us of being fanatics and deviating from GOD because of this.
I find that funny in a sad kind of way. Starting with the fact that I have NEVER pushed our lifestyle on people. If they are interested, we can talk, but if not, I say nothing. I know no one can convince anyone else to their side. It has to be desired.
And HEY... did not GOD give this to us? Did HE not provide natural cures for HIS people just for the taking? And yet, how does taking prescription meds more GODLY?
duh.
I watch football. I love football. There show allopathic commercials during games. Samuel and I always time how long the warnings are. There has never been a time when the warnings did not last WAY longer than the benefits. It has become a game for us. Almost laughable if not for the fact that millions of people are calling their doctors and ask for said medication. Then it is no longer funny but tragic.
Now don't get me wrong, I am thankful for allopathic medicine in some instances, for example if my child breaks his or her arm, I do not want to go to the emergency room and have someone say, 'here eat an apple'. duh.
I just think too often, there are things we can do to benefit our body first, way many more natural options before trying to fix it and not harm it else where.
Moving on...
Like I mentioned before, I signed up for 1/2 marathon #4.
I think I am crazy. And maybe a little delusional. OR maybe just a glutton for punishment.
OR maybe I will not go to the gym unless there is a goal to reach. And to show just how pathetic I am, before you think I am this person who has their act together ( HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA) getting in shape is not a good enough reason for me to wake up at 5:45 in the morning to go to the gym.
No sirree. There has to be a GOOD reason to get up that early.
The SUPER HERO 1/2 is it....
Seriously, I CANNOT WAIT to wear a cape!!!
In honor of doing this, my daughter got me a book.
How to Train Like A Mother.
If it wasn't that she is so excited, and she is a natural runner herself, I would think she was evil.
And hey, why is there not a book called How To Train Like A Grandmother?
I should write it.
The first chapter would be called, "Are you 7 Kinds of Stupid??!!??" And the second, " Put Down The Running Shoes and Go Bake Some Cookies."
Now thats my kind of book!!!
Saturday, January 5, 2013
3 YEARS!!!
Look at this face! 3 years ago today, we ran over to China, saw this face and cried!
We had been waiting for this moment, when we could look into these eyes, hold this child, kiss those cheeks, take her home.
3 years ago today, she step into our arms and our lives have never been the same.
Here she is 3 years later!!!
Our beautiful girl.
HAPPY GOTCHA DAY ELLY-BUG!
GOD has been gracious to us.
May HE be your everything.
Thursday, January 3, 2013
Slug on a Rug
I hate running/power walking. I really do.
Or training.
Or waking up at 5:50am to go to the JCC to train when it is freezing outside. Or even when it is nice.
Or signing up for races that force me to actually have to do this.
BUT, I like the feeling of achievement.
Accomplishment.
Personal best.
It is true...
I am a walking oxymoron.
So, here is 1/2 marathon #4.
Daughter #1 came over and I felt utterly lethargic and slug-on-a-rug-gish, so I asked her to look up a 1/2 for me for the Spring. Then I changed my mind and asked for a 10k.
She ( who has done marathons and everything in between, and being the crazy runner who runs even when she is pregnant! On purpose!!) told me not to back down and go for the top.
So, come May 19th, I will be running the Super Hero 1/2 Marathon!!!
I need me a cape, because doggone it, if its super hero race, I am going to run in a cape.
Now, to decide what kind of cape...
Batman?
Superman?
Green Lantern?
Capt. America?
Spiderman?
Do 1/2 these guys even HAVE capes??!!??!
Maybe, I just need a hobbit cape. After all, I will probably be as clumsy and slow as a hobbit. :P
We shall see.
So come tomorrow morning, it is off to the gym. I will probably be grumbling and irritated that I signed up.
Annoyed that my daughter was so quick to encourage the insanity.
Angry that it is so darn cold.
But it will get me out there, out of the house, and back to getting in shape. ish.
Or training.
Or waking up at 5:50am to go to the JCC to train when it is freezing outside. Or even when it is nice.
Or signing up for races that force me to actually have to do this.
BUT, I like the feeling of achievement.
Accomplishment.
Personal best.
It is true...
I am a walking oxymoron.
So, here is 1/2 marathon #4.
Daughter #1 came over and I felt utterly lethargic and slug-on-a-rug-gish, so I asked her to look up a 1/2 for me for the Spring. Then I changed my mind and asked for a 10k.
She ( who has done marathons and everything in between, and being the crazy runner who runs even when she is pregnant! On purpose!!) told me not to back down and go for the top.
So, come May 19th, I will be running the Super Hero 1/2 Marathon!!!
I need me a cape, because doggone it, if its super hero race, I am going to run in a cape.
Now, to decide what kind of cape...
Batman?
Superman?
Green Lantern?
Capt. America?
Spiderman?
Do 1/2 these guys even HAVE capes??!!??!
Maybe, I just need a hobbit cape. After all, I will probably be as clumsy and slow as a hobbit. :P
We shall see.
So come tomorrow morning, it is off to the gym. I will probably be grumbling and irritated that I signed up.
Annoyed that my daughter was so quick to encourage the insanity.
Angry that it is so darn cold.
But it will get me out there, out of the house, and back to getting in shape. ish.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)